When I wrote these words yesterday in my SL Feed, I didn't realize I was starting to lose balance, yet again. (Don't you ever learn? Well apparently, no.)
I realized this morning, when I was watering the grass. Despite having done an impressive job in the garden during Summer, all by my own (the details don't matter now), I noticed small spots that were taking water eagerly, and they should have taken it yesterday, not today.
I always have that problem. If I'm working in the garden, I end up so tired that I cannot work in anything else for the day. If I work in anything else (because, paying bills and such), then I don't find the right chance to go outside and continue doing maintenance at the garden. In the meantime, the headaches that come when weather changes leave me so beaten that often I cannot work in either. And if you ask why I don't plan my time and set one day and fixed hours to work in the garden, I would love to tell you great idea, I'll do that, but my mind refuses that. No matter how hard I've tried, I'm absolutely unable of following an schedule of that kind.
I cannot find balance, I'm always stumbling from one extreme to the other one.
But I saved the garden. For now.
I would like to take some photos and share them here. Show all of you this is what I meant with recovering it and, why not, feel some pride about what I've done.
There's something preventing me from doing so, at least for now.
There are certain eyes following everything I post in as many places as they have found. Eyes that I thought I had defeated four years ago. While those eyes are free to read everything I post (else why making it public?), they contacted me a few months ago. They should have never done that, they should have left me in peace, but no... Those eyes wanted my attention. Those eyes even told me they were starting to think to move somewhere else. Somewhere like... Spain. While I cannot give credit to the words of eyes that lie so much, I shouldn't also entirely discard the possibility.
Those eyes are sick, those eyes lie to everybody, starting by themselves. Those eyes lie about me, of course, and about the reasons why I don't want them close, but I'm not going to defend myself from whichever lies, and I don't want to know what lies are those. If someone chooses to believe them, that person was never relevant to me in the first place.
I've always said that you must be careful with what you make public about yourself, no matter it's the Internet or people close to you, but particularly, on the Internet. I've always said that there are many predators, abusers, observing and waiting for their next victim to prey on.
Did you think I said all that from my high horse, out of touch with the ground, because it's easy telling others what to do but never having lived the situation?
Now you begin to know the answer.
Mesh body: Lara, from Maitreya
Mesh hands: Lara's hands, from Maitreya
Mesh feet: Lara’s feet, from Maitreya
Skin: Lulu 02 C, Jamaica, from Glam Affair
Freckles: Cassiopea Cosmetics, A (tn), from Glam Affair
Hair: You send me, Reds (Russet), from Exile
Dress: Swept Away Dress, Cream, from (fashionably dead)
Necklace: Swept Away Necklace, White Gold, from (fashionably dead)
Poses: Balance #2 and #4, Black Tulip (mine)
Poles: Decorative Poles, Black Tulip (mine)
Windlight Sky: [TOR] NIGHT - That spells moon 2
Windlight Water: Pond